Congratulations to everyone that is newly engaged! I have had many questions and enquiries in the last couple of weeks about how to start to plan so here is my advice to get you off on the right path. Being engaged really is the most fabulous feeling and you want to tell the whole world. My advice is to do just that!! Take some time to enjoy this time before you throw yourself into your wedding planning. Once you start although it’s really good fun it can also get pretty full on.
Having a few weeks or months to bask in the enjoyment of being engaged with nothing to do is just lovely. It seems many of you get very overwhelmed with the idea of trying to organise and plan everything. Taking this time will allow you to calmly think about what you want. You will certainly reap the rewards in the long term.
Many couples are tempted to go straight out and start booking the first suppliers they meet. Beware! think it through first. Unless you have to get married in a few weeks or months there is no rush to get it all done at once. Choosing who helps bring your wedding day to life is very important. They have a massive effect on you and your day.
Planning a wedding is a great achievement especially when your guests come up to you and tell you how much fun they had and what an amazing day it was. It will end up this way if you spend some time thinking it through before you start to get bogged down in all the practical side of planning.
Having a clear picture of what you want will be useful to not only you, but your suppliers will thank you too. They will be able to offer you the service or product you need because you are clear on what you want from them. You budget will thank you because you will know what to spend your cash on. If you are not careful you can run out as soon as you get engaged and start to buy lots of pretty things that you may not need once you have had chance to think some more.
How do you start to plan?
If you follow The Wedding Genie philosophy you do it your way and you choose activities and personal details that your friends and family can take part in and will understand. There will be elements of your personality that really make your wedding stand out above others that your guests have been too.
Here are my ideas on how to organize your thoughts and come up with a wedding day vision that is clear, what you really want and shouts of YOU!
What Do You Really Want? Choose Your Priorities
The first thing is to just take some quiet time and sit and think about how you imagine your perfect wedding day to be. Close your eyes and visualise what it looks like, what it feels like, even how it smells. Yes use all your senses and then write down what you thought of. It doesn’t have to be detailed notes just ideas and feelings. You’ll be surprised at what you come up with. Irrespective of the venue you choose there will be a theme or style or feel that comes out of your brainstorming. Sit down together as a couple and do this. Remember it’s a day for BOTH of you. Men are great at the practical side of wedding planning and usually have really good input. Decide on what you absolutely have to have and what you don’t! Make a list of these and make them your priorities. You might need to compromise but it should be a joint effort. There might be four of five major things on your list like, great photography, fab food, a live band. Whatever they are this will be the foundation for your budget.
What time of year is your most favourite? – Choose a Date
Do you love winter and the way you can dress up for the weather, real fires, smells of the winter, warming drinks and food with candle light? Are you a summer bird who loves the outdoors,the heat and anything bright? How about a time that means something to you? The time of year you first met maybe. Your first holiday, when or where you were proposed to.It should be all about You – Your stamp on the day
What kind of person are you? Do you love quiet gatherings with fabulous food and great company? Are you a party animal who is the life and soul of a night out? Are you artistic with a love for the eco friendly. Whatever you are the best weddings reflect you both! One of my lovely brides I am working with now was deciding whether to have favours or not. She has come up with a brilliant idea that suits the situation she is in, reflects her new husband to be’s job and completely involves her family who are extremely important to her. I can’t tell you what it is but it will be perfect and her guests will be very moved by this small detail.
Who Do You Want to Share Your Day With? – The Guest List
Choosing the people you want at your wedding is necessary before you can choose a venue. If you only want to have a very small intimate affair that’s fine. If a large wedding is your dream that’s great too as long as your budget stretches to feed and entertain everyone. Think carefully about who you want to share your day. Guests really do make the day. BUT they have a great effect on the budget.
Where Would You Like to Be Married? Choose a Ceremony Type and Venue
If your absolute desire is to marry in a Tipi Tent in the middle of a field then why not do just that? I know I am a wedding planner and should know better that you have to marry legally in a building with walls and foundations and the relevant licence. Well how about getting married quietly in your local registry office and having a celebrant marry you “again” in your Tipi? Your ceremony can be exactly what you want it to be, involve as many friends and family as you like, say and do what suits your personalities. If you think outside of the box you can do whatever you like. This way you will be legally married and have the ceremony your really yearn for. What’s more you get to do it twice!
Alternatively choose between a church and civil wedding ceremony. I think you have to decide what would be typical for you and your partner’s idea of a perfect ceremony. If the idea of a civil ceremony puts you off because they are not that personal dispel that thought immediately. I got married this way and we took the time to make up wedding vows that really meant something to us. I said a lovely poem to my husband that I was so moved by from a film would you believe. Our family thought the ceremony was the best part of the day. I guess what I am saying is when your wedding planning takes over go back to basics and really understand why you are getting married and make the ceremony mean something to both of you.
What are your favourite colours and interests? Your Stamp on The Day
This maybe dictated by the time of year you choose to get married but anything goes now and as long as you are careful you can have pretty much anything you like. For instance if you love the winter but also lean towards bright colours you can choose to use bright splashes of colour against a black and white background or autumnal colours with splashes of bright colours to lift the theme. If you don’t really have a favourite colour then how about a fabulous classic look, creams, and greens. Lush foliage with soft shades of cream gives a classy sophisticated feel to the day.
For a theme for the wedding why not try and involve your hobbies or interests. You may be a film buff or a foodie or absolutely love flowers. Whatever this can be highlighted in your day.
What will it cost? The Budget
Whether you put your budget here, or at the top of this list it has to be one of the first things you determine. It is imperative you set this and think about how you are going to achieve it. Work out where the money is coming from. Is the wedding going to be funded by yourselves or a mix of donations from your and fiancés parents. You could argue that before you even start to visualise your day you should set a budget. To my thinking having a clear idea of what you want and then looking at your budget to see if it will afford you this vision is a good exercise. This way you at least have a list of needs and what are important and then you can allocate this budget according to what is the most important.
If you do this now you will have a great foundation for your wedding planning.
- The Date
- Your Priorities
- Your Guest List
- A Venue and Ceremony type
- Style
- Budget
The last piece of advice is don’t panic take your time. Just do these steps first. Make sure you take time out from your wedding planning too. It can take over your life. You must have nights or weekends where you don’t talk about it. Please enjoy the planning, if you just pace yourself it will be fun. If you want some help just to make it clear why not book one of my bridal workshops. It’s a fun way to start your wedding planning and you will go home with everything you need to make your wedding planning a breeze.
Until next time, happy planning.
If you are recently engaged or just starting to plan your wedding here are a few of my top tips for getting you started. Before you do anything at all you have to “Set Your Priorities” and fix a Budget! If you follow the Wedding Genie blog you will know that these two stages are crucial in wedding planning. If you don’t know what you want from your day and how much you want to spend it makes the wedding planning journey quite a rocky road.
At the Wedding Genie we are committed to helping couples start married life with a strong foundation. We really hate it when we hear how the wedding budget escalated, and the day after the wedding couples are hit by the reality of a huge debt that is going to take months, or even years to pay off. We ran this blog last year so we thought for anyone who has recently become engaged, Congratulations! it would be very useful. We have added a few more tips to help. 
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